Monday, April 09, 2007
Utmost in your mind is success. You are constantly seeking stimulation and a life full of experience. You are trying to 'grow' and above all you need to develop freely and to shake off the shackles of self-doubt. You are an enthusiastic individual, full of life with the desire to live intensely. You like contact with others and are enthusiastic by nature. You are receptive to anything new, modern or intriguing. Your interests are many and you are likely to expand your fields of activities. You are optimistic about the future and you deserve every success because deep down you are a 'winner'.
You like the better things in life. You are sensuous and emotional. You are a follower of the Arts and you seek an environment that will give you the fulfilment to the senses that you need.
It's the old old story - I am misunderstood - my partner (be it in your private life or in business) just doesn't understand me and YOU also believe at this time that you are being completely MISUNDERSTOOD by one and all. It then obviously follows that you naturally feel inhibited and not appreciated. It is perhaps because of this belief that you feel compelled to stand back and let the rest of the world go by.
As for developing a firm relationship - inwardly deep down in your subconscious mind you are wary of even trying to get close to another person because you feel that if you open up your heart and feelings you are sure to get hurt. Since you are living in a society where close relationships are the norm, you feel that there is that need to conform, but any close relationships of any magnitude that you may have tried in the past have unfortunately left you without any sense of emotional involvement.You are being unduly influenced by the situation that is all around you. You do not like the feeling of loneliness and whatever it is that seems to separate you from others. You know that life can be wonderful and you are anxious to experience life in all its aspects, to live it to the full. You therefore resent any restriction or limitations that are being imposed on you and you insist on going it alone.
You don't like authority and you rebel against all forms of limitation. You are your own person and you intend to stay that way and to get on in the world simply by your hard work and determination.WOW,,,maybe it's just self-fulfilling psychology.
But, more or less,,,that's me.
Koped from Tubao's blog. XDD
http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg/What can I say... WOW.
But it's like,
as much as I'm pretty unsure about myself. I'm pretty glad that some consistent trends are showing up. For example, I really really love music movies food technology and books.
And then, I have a severe distaste of things religious in nature, and irrationality, being overly-emotional and well, just letting your cracks show.
You know when I was 13 plus still figuring my way out in life,
I thought I would be that sort of person who's so happy and cheerful everyday,
and then next thing you know I would have committed suicide for no apparent reason. I mean, people keep on saying Geminis have split-personalities and all.
And I always know that what I perceive as the real me is radically different from what most people see. And I know it's deliberate choice of mine, because, somehow, like that test said, well I'm just not an open book person. By choice.
Maybe that's what accounted for that eternal state of loneliness I always feel creeping about me, even if I'm laughing with my friends, or walking in the middle of a crowd.
But I believe that all of us feel like that one way or another.
It's like one of those common universal experiences.Feeling lost and wanting to be found,wanting to have somebody light up your way, holding your hand, to lead you home at the end of the road.Budden, like whateverrr lor.
I'm sure everyone's had their downs and shit and stuff.
You just need to be really honest about how you're dealing with it.
And learn to deal with it. And deal with it intelligently, realising that it's only human to feel this way/ that way/ like shit. Blah blah.
And right now,
through all these years (omg I sound old),
I know there ARE things in life worth living for. Music movies food technology and friends. And even though I feel like I'm in a permanent state of aloofness even with people around me, even in the middle of a crowd. Well, that's no big deal because the company's still great.
No matter what shit things there be in life,
no success, no friends, no love, no family, whateverrr.
The fact that we are alive is something worth rejoicing in, for its own sake, I guess.
It's like I beat a billion other people in getting to be delivered in this world,
how great is that! And no matter how bad things are, I AM here and that makes me the WINNER, I am alive and that gives me the power and ability to change things.
I mean,
happiness is a state of being. More than a pursuit.
I'll never stop my pursuit for the good things in life,
and I'm sure happiness is in that every step you take, every action you make towards the realisation, actualisation, crystallisation of something great.
I mean,
it's just cool to be alive. You know.
Despite all that shit.
I mean,
it's like,
just look at all the great people in history.
How many actually ever found recognition in their time?
Every human desires to be liked, and stuff.
But I seriously think it takes far more courage and reserve to do things your way, even if the whole world's gonna mock at you, people's gonna leave and desert you.
It sure takes a hell load of gut to deny all that socialisation has to say about what you are supposed to do and just be yourself, do what feels right to you.
Of cuz,
I'm making the assumption here that what you wanna do is really really important and by all logical and rational analyses possible, it is something worth doing. Yet most people are too safe in the arms of common sensical knowledge to think otherwise, to think big, to really think for themself, to challenge the no-brainer faith inundated in society.
Ok that's a lot of drifting away from the topic.
But like what I always like to say,
to each his own!And this is MY life.
I'm gonna live it to my best,to the best of my ability. Never let anything bring me down. And I mean NEVER.
;rock YOU.
4:49 PM
