Friday, September 01, 2006
anyways
recently, im kind of like back into my slacking phase, full blast.
sleep when lectures start,
wake up with the bell.
either copy or dun hand in hw @ all.
think of nothing but sleep all the time.
geez.
h8 it lar.
and see, im wasting my time here. jeseus!
fact is,
it sucks knowing there's so much you could do, more than an average person, yet not pulling em off because of yourself.
why did i watch akeelah and the bee?
i msut be out of my mind.
all i knew is,
i was looking for some form of inspiration.
found some, but it's too feeble to push me on.
i think i'll buy a dvd player @ comex so that i can watch hotel rawanda and les choir whateverrrs.
btw,
akeelah and the bee got really good review from rottentomatoes.com lar. =.=
a site i routinely check out to be updated on the latest movies + reviews....
jiu,
i guess i simply was too tired lar actually.
'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond imagination. It is our light more than our darkness which scares us. We ask ourselves – who are we to be brilliant, beautiful, talented, and fabulous. But honestly, who are you to not be so?
You are a child of God, small games do not work in this world. For those around us to feel peace, it is not example to make ourselves small. We were born to express the glory of god that lives in us. It is not in some of us, it is in all of us. While we allow our light to shine, we unconsciously give permission for others to do the same. When we liberate ourselves from our own fears, simply our presence may liberate others.’'- Marianne Williamson in Return to Love: Reflections on a Course in Miracles
sometimes i feel like i need a good cry to let something within me flow.
the thing being,
i cant even feel sorrow anymore,
sometimes.
i just look the world in the eye and wondering why am i here.
it's kind of like,
why can someone be breathing, laughing, talking and physically existing,
when mentally he/she can feel so detached and estranged from the rest of the world.
sometimes even when im outside with all the people,
all of a sudden i'd just find myself walking thru some desert,
my vision penetrating some mirage of countless people talking interacting laughing smiling using words that make no sense to me.
只是反覆地覺得
世界沒有想像的美好
而我一直不確定到底甚麼我想要
也許悲觀是種毒藥 令人深陷其中不能自己
儘管我一直都在很努力 膚淺而簡單地過日子
不表現出來是不是就不曾存在
那麼我應該只是一個軀體
靈魂被絕望分割得難分難捨
暗夜里悲傷不斷重播
提醒著有些回憶從來都不曾離去
有些回憶再也不能回去
有些事情注定只能匯入回憶
變成憂鬱的存值
我以為我可以
卻一再地作繭自縛
如果人生只是一場戲
為甚麼我不能抽離自己的情緒?
也許有一天 連面具都成為了真實
反正沒有甚麼好堅持
我沒有原則 只有困惑
我沒有生命 只是活著
痛苦是故作堅強扭曲笑容的臉的身影
許多人 走近了又離開
反覆循環
只有骨子裡洶湧的寂寞澎湃 一直都在
在喧囂吵鬧人潮擁擠的時候
在世界靜謐得像是潮汐呼吸的時候
人生像是一個舞台 燈光打下來
喜怒哀樂都不由自主
~~~
給我一秒鐘的時間
深刻地淚流滿面
然後熟練地綻開最熟悉的笑顏
生命只存在一瞬間
一瞬間 讓我記住你的臉
Only as high as I reach can I grow,
Only as far as I seek can I go,
Only as deep as I look can I see,
Only as much as I dream can I be.~Karen Ravn
;rock YOU.
12:00 PM
